


Application and Practice

by Emiline



Category: Cadfael Chronicles - Ellis Peters
Genre: Gen, Nuns, Yuletide 2014
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-20
Updated: 2014-12-20
Packaged: 2018-03-02 11:55:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2811104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emiline/pseuds/Emiline
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Snippets from the life of Avice of Thornbury/Sister Magdalen after she comes to Polesworth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Application and Practice

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Isis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Isis/gifts).



> I didn't quite end up with a runaway bride, but there is a runaway bride-to-be in this story.
> 
> Borrowing Sister Magdalen, Mother Mariana, and Polesworth from the estate of Ellis Peters (or whoever owns the characters now). I have invented a whole slew of characters to populate the rest of the story.

When, in the year 1139, Avice of Thornbury entered the Abbey of Polesworth in Godric’s Ford Mother Mariana was not yet so frail in mind that she could not question a new postulant whose motives she had reason to doubt. Avice was not the first formerly kept woman to pass through Polesworth’s gates but such women were not common visitors and Mother Mariana had never met one who had so firmly and confidently declared her intention to take the veil.

And when Avice had told her tale, Mother Mariana considered her and said: 

“Taking holy vows is a serious matter. Nunhood is not something to be entered into lightly, or because a woman feels she has no where else to go. To be a nun you must have a vocation, a love of God that burns steadily and brightly within you. You must want it with all your heart. We can give you a place of quiet from the world, for a time, but we are still of the world, and if you seek to distance yourself from the world then nunhood is the wrong path. A vocation is not a desire to run away, or flee those things that plague us. We will not turn away any woman who is truly called to serve God and the world by taking the veil but we would do any woman and ourselves a great deal of harm if we allowed her to become a nun without an appropriate period of discernment and opportunity to try the life that we lead. It is not an easy or simple one, and once you have taken final vows there is no going back. For your sake, as well as ours, we must be convinced that the path you desire to follow is the correct path. And you must remember that love, not fear should guide you.”

Avice heard all this in respectful silence, and if any of it troubled her it did not show in her face.

“Reverend Mother, I assure you that I do not seek to join your order out of a desire to withdraw myself from the world, nor do I ask for entrance because I am afraid”. She paused, and lowered her eyes demurely. “I do not wonder that you have doubts as to my fitness and commitment to this path. The life that I have led is not one that many approve of.” She tilted her face up slightly, and looked Mother Mariana straight in the eye. “I have committed many sins, but I do not lie, and I am quite sincere when I say that there is nothing I desire more than to become a novice in this holy order, and if God be willing and myself found worthy, a Sister among you. I understand the terms which are to be placed on me, and the time and tasks which I must undertake to discern whether my calling is a true one.”

“Then I accept your word, Avice of Thornbury. You will have ample time to spend in prayer and careful consideration of what God is calling you to do for I would not presume to put a limit on your period of discernment. For who among us can clearly hear the voice of God? Even the saints are not always granted that privilege.”

She paused and gazed into the fire for a few moments.

“I would ask you to consider one more matter in your journey with us – that of your past as a kept woman,” she continued. “It must be truly and honestly put aside if you are to become one of us, even as novice. You know this already, I know. But you must also know (as perhaps you already do) that while you can lay down your past, you cannot conceal it. Even if you become a nun there will be many who know of your past. You must be prepared to face them and their prejudices. Are you ready for that? A nun with a past as a kept woman is much different experience than a woman who is simply a kept woman, or was one.”

Avice moved as though she would speak, and Mother Mariana held up one hand. “You need not answer me now. Indeed, I would prefer you did not answer me now, for you cannot know what it will be like until you have tried it a while. But later I will ask you again, and then I will hear your answer. Now, Sister Eularia will bring you new clothes, show you where you will sleep, and introduce you to the other nuns.”

“Thank you, Mother Mariana.”

“God be with you, Avice.”

xxxxx

The nuns were naturally curious about Avice. This woman who had lived in sin for so many years, who freely admitted she had chosen to do so rather than wed lawfully. There were some among them who worried at what sort of influence Avice might have, particularly on some of the younger nuns. And there were many who doubted her vocation, including some who thought it impossible for such a woman to have a vocation to be a nun.

But Avice showed such an honest desire and application for work of all kinds, that she soon won them over. Whether the task required skills that were her strong suit or not, she always gave each task her all, and had such a good sense of humor that they grew fond of her.

Avice was a great deal of help, for she was both lettered and numbered, a rare set of skills to enter a nunnery with. And she had a patient hand for copying of texts, which brought in much-needed income for Polesworth.

And if she occasionally acted in way that the others considered unwomanly, such actions as she took were always ultimately to the abbey’s good, and beyond being unwomanly they could not find fault with them.

So it stood on the day in 1140 that Gunora, breathless and wild-eyed with fear ran onto the grounds, and declared her intention of never stepping foot outside the hallowed walls.

Sister Clemencia, the hosteller and sometimes herbalist, who had been leaving the gardens as Gunora arrived, was first to speak with her and took her to Sister Johanna, the defacto woman in charge. Mother Mariana, by this time was sliding gently into her second childhood and by unspoken agreement amongst the sisters problems were taken first to Sister Johanna. Sister Johanna had never had aspirations to lead the sisters but she recognized both the necessity of doing so, and that the sisters had desired that she be the one.

Sister Johanna was in quiet conference in the chapel with Sister Magdalen, who had but recently taken final vows. Sister Johanna desired Gunora to explain her predicament.

“I will not return to my family, no matter what you say!” Gunora cried hotly.

“Indeed? And why is that?” Sister Magdalen inquired mildly.

“Because they insist that I marry John the cobbler, and nothing could induce me to do so. He is the most boorish, vile young man that I have had the displeasure of being acquainted with. And my parents declare that if I will not marry him they will not support me any longer, and that the nunnery is my only recourse. And though I am not greatly enthused by the idea of becoming a nun but I would rather that than marry John Cobbler.”

Sister Eularia entered the chapel, looking slightly flushed.

“Sister Johanna, please do come,” she said urgently. “Mother Mariana is taken poorly and Sister Helena is in need of assistance in treating her. She asked for you specifically."

Sister Johanna’s lips tightened in fear.

“Sister Magdalen, Gunora, I must attend to Mother Mariana. Sister Magdalen, I leave Gunora in your charge. Take the time you need to come to understanding of this problem. Gunora, Sister Magdalen will give you a fair hearing. Sister Magdalen, I give you leave to miss Vespers if need be.”

And off she went, to help Sister Helena, the infirmerer.

Some of the anger which had built in Gunora had ebbed away as a result of this unexpected interruption.

Sister Magdalen said mildly “It is a fine day Gunora, will you walk with me in our gardens? You can tell me your tale there.”

Gunora nodded stiffly. “Yes, Sister.”

The beauty and fragrance of the gardens, did, as Sister Magdalen had hoped, serve to calm Gunora further.

“Now,” began Sister Magdalen, “why is it that you do not wish to marry this John Cobbler?”

“Because I hate him!” cried Gunora. “He is a spiteful, horrible boy. Do not mistake me, Sister Magdalen, I am no romantic. But I cannot marry a person whom I do not at least respect, and who does me the courtesy of the same. John is bitter, and resentful, and wishes for a wife and bedmate, not a companion. He desires to marry me because he finds my looks to his liking, and because he is tired of shifting for himself. He wants a servant, not a wife.”

“He need not marry if that be the case,” Sister Magdalen remarked drly. Gunora stopped her pacing and threw a startled glance at Sister Magdalen.

“I do not mean that you would be that person,” Sister Magdalen assured her.

“I had not thought a nun would know or speak of such things,” Gunora admitted a little unsteadily.

“Some would not,” Sister Magdalen replied. “But a nunnery is not isolated or insulated as many would believe. We are all of the same world, whether we take holy vows, or marry, or enter into an agreement.”

Gunora stared at her with open curiosity.

“Yet he desires to marry you,” Sister Magdalen probed gently. “Or is it some other force which pushes him to offer for you?”

“He wants me, but I doubt very much he truly wants to marry me. But his father, Elias, certainly wants him married. John – I am not supposed to know this of him, but I too have eyes and ears and know what is said of him – John is somewhat too wild for his father’s taste. Elias desires that John marry in the hope, I presume that this would settle him down, or at least teach him some modicum of discression.”

“You do not think this likely.” It was not a question, for Sister Magdalen saw the truth of it in Gunora’s face. “Why do your parents encourage the match?”

“Because we have few options, and as John’s wife I would be unlikely to starve,” she replied bluntly. “John is a repugnant man, but he is good cobbler and knows his business. He has a liking for women and drink, but he won’t bankrupt himself or his family. Whatever else his is, he will maintain the cobbling business as it ought.”

With a sudden sigh, she sat down heavily on a low wall that ringed part of the garden.

“I cannot marry John, though for the sake of my family I wish I could. I suppose I must become a nun, for what else is there for me? Though I own I do not think I would make a good nun.”

Sister Magdalen sat down beside her, and gazed with studious nonchalance out to the horizon.

“This place can certainly be one of refuge for you, but only for a time. It would be as wrong for you to take the veil as a course of last resort as it would be for you to marry John Cobbler for sake of your family, and at the cost of your own happiness. That you wish to help your family is a good and noble thing, but you are young and have much life left before you, and to consign yourself to misery would be to waste that which has been given to you.”

“But what can I do?” Gunora asked, turning towards her.

“Do you truly believe your family will force you marry him if you return?”

Gunora tugged at a strand of hair nervously.

“I do not know. They know already that I do not wish to marry him, but we have very little, and my brothers and sisters are also to be thought of. Oh, that I were a man, and could strike out for my own fortune!”  
“Is there someone else whom you would rather marry?”

Gunora shook her head. “There is no such man, nor is there likely to be. I do not think I could marry a stranger.”

“Would you learn a trade that you could practice on your own, if you could, truly?”

“Yes, I would.”

Sister Magdalen considered this a moment, then nodded briskly.

“Have you any skills with birthing and children?”

“Yes, for I have helped my mother with my younger siblings.”

“I know of a woman who is a midwife, and journeys every year here. She will be here in some two months hence or so, and it may be that she would take you as apprentice.”

“Do you really think I could?”

“Mistress Swale spoke to me last year that she was thinking of taking on an apprentice. I do not know if she is still in need of one, it may or may not be. But as regarding your ability to do it, it is not what I think that matters, but what you and Mistress Swale think. You know your skills, your temperament, your desires better than I.”

“Oh, I think I could!”

“Then think on it. Remember that if she takes you on it will be hard work, and long nights, and you will be away from your family much. And you will see much more death than you would otherwise.”

“Oh thank you, Sister Magdalen, thank you!” Gunora replied, face shining.

“And do not forgot to think on what you will do if Mistress Swale cannot take you on. You are welcome to stay here a few days if you like before returning home.”

The bells tolled for Vespers.

“I think,” said Gunora abruptly, “that I would like to lie down for a little while. I feel very tired.”

“Follow me,” Sister Magdalen replied. “I will show you where you can rest, and I will go to Vespers, and tomorrow you can decide what it is you would like to do.”


End file.
